why DID the chicken cross the road?

Yesterday I did a meme begun, for me anyway, at House of Lime.  It ended with my ten questions for anyone who cared to answer.  Crazy4Coens at

Raising Sunny

10 from my friend Ananda 
answered mine and gave out ten of her own... which I will answer here before a brief set of general comments and some photos at the end.

1. What is your earliest memory?

The earliest memory that I can recall is sitting on Papa's knee while he played checkers.  He called me  "jitter bug".  I guess I was wiggly even back then.

2. Did you ever believe in the Easter Bunny?

What?  I still believe in the Easter Bunny!

3. Where did you learn the most - preschool, elementary school, junior high, high school, college, post grad, or elsewhere?

Out of all my schools, Ananda would be where I learned the most... though little was educational.

However, I have to say that life has taught me more through experience than any school ever could...

good and  bad. 

4. What is your favorite Bob Dylan song or album?

My current favorite Dylan song... and it cycles...

is (with thanks to Cricket)

Bob backed by Dire Straits

"I Believe In You" 

5. If your house was on fire (or flooding, or in the path of tornado) what would you be glad (secretly or otherwise) to never see again?

A few months ago I'd have toasted marshmallows

if the box on rocks had caught fire...

Now I'd do my best to throw my body on this house and roll on it to snuff the fire out. 

6. Would you rather read fiction or non-fiction and why?

I read anything and enjoy it.  I like to learn, but I love fiction most.  It's the imagination and story telling quality that snare me.

 

7. Do you receive the newspaper delivery at your home?

Nope.

8. Mac or PC?

PC!!!!!

9. Was your first kiss all that you hoped it would be?

It was down right creepy and totally unexpected.

10. If you won the lottery, what would be the first thing you would spend money on?

A bran spanking new fire engine red 

Dodge Challenger.

Ta dah!  Thanks for playing C4C... fun questions!

Now for general nonsense...

I caught this city chick strutting across my driveway a few minutes ago.   

She did not want to be photographed... and when I tried to ask her why she had crossed the road...

she successfully evaded answering me by hiding under the camp trailer.  What a nice surprise to begin my day!

So in honor of my little red guest... why do you think the chicken crossed the road? 

A joke I laughed myself silly over:

Two wives of best friend husbands decided to go out while their husbands watched a game on TV.  Over the course of the evening, they laughed and drank a bit more than they should.  Being responsible, they decided to walk home, though it was very late.  

"Oh crap!  I have to pee!"  One announced.  The other said she needed to go as well.  They held it as long as they could, until passing a cemetery, decided to use the privacy there to relieve themselves.  Being clean women, one used her panties to wipe and the other a ribbon from a withered floral arrangement.

The next day one husband calls the other...

"I think we have a problem.  My wife came home without her panties!"

The other husband snorted...

"You bet we do!  My wife came home with a card stuck to her butt that reads... We will all miss you!"

Now go forth and giggle into the world.  Have a merry day everyone!

 

 

  

LIME DISEASE

Yesterday, lime over at

House of Lime

posted another meme that tickled me.

If you are into it, then by all means go to her house and check out the succession of the meme and her always funny responses.  Yes, I have lime disease... addicted to her humor!

(I hope you do not mind that I snagged your photo, lime!)

I promised to post the meme she set up with answers.

So here we go.

Lime's Questions

1. What is the best use for canned peas since they are unfit for human consumption?

You cannot have tuna casserole without peas!

 
2. How many BP execs does it take to plug an oil well?

Only one of the assholes.

 
3.Where did you hide your last victim?

In the library, with the candle stick.

 
4. What one junk food or vice do you want researchers to discover is actually good for you?

D-A-R-K C-H-O-C-O-L-A-T-E

(Oh wait... they did that.  YAY!)
5. Would you rather crawl on a track of razor blades then swim in a vat of lemon juice or listen to the collected works of Yoko Ono continuously for 24 hours while snuggling with Marilyn Manson?

Bring on the lemon juice and razor blades!

 
6. Daisy Duke or Ellie Mae Clampett / Luke Duke or Jethro (as applies to your gender preference)?

Based on I.Q.

Luke Duke.

 
7. Who? What? When? Where? How? And most importantly, why?

Me. Drunk elephant cake. First 20 years of my life.

Fresno, Ca.  Mom got it.  She used the Buick station wagon.  My birthday! 

 
8. I almost forgot...how much?

Chocolate and marshmallow cake for days!

 
9. Dazzle me with some mad skillz I never knew you had.

Sorry, that one is unprintable. 

;-)

10. What super power would you like to have and why?

Super Mind Easing Location... knowing where the people I love and care about are and what they are doing and are safe.

I am assuming that I am now supposed to come up with 10 questions of my own, so... answer if you like here or at your place, but do let me know if you post them elsewhere.  I'm curious.

1) If you could live anywhere on Earth, where would it be?

2) What thing really burned you up recently? 

3)  What thing or event or person really made you happy recently?

4) The age old questions... choose all or whatever;

Pepsi or Coke

 or 

Miracle Whip or Mayo

or

Stones or Beetles?

5) What was the strangest thing you have done?

6) Who is your personal hero?

7) What did you do as a child that gave you a sense of pride?

8) How are you connected to Kevin Bacon?

(Supposedly we all are in some way.)

9) What do you have an honest passion for?

10) How lame is this set of questions?

Okay, if you are not a meme person, then tell us what you would rather be doing and why?

Yes, I do know that when it comes to memes that I am no lime.

Have a wonderful Tuesday everyone.  Randy is off work today (inventory) and I have snuck out of bed to do this post and blog a bit so that I can spend the day enjoying him when he gets up... should be soon.

But I will check in from time to time.

 

  

TRADITIONAL OR WHAT

ii

  I have become sort of a Rachel Ray addict.  I'm a serious "foodie" among other things... she makes me laugh and those great recipes!  "Delish!"  If you have never seen her show, check it out.  Highly entertaining.

Rachael Ray

 

Last week... maybe Thursday... she had a doctor on who had written a couple of books on how to have a happy relationship... one for men and one for women.  However, the focus that day was on women who opt for the "traditional" relationship in these modern days.  Think June and Ward Cleaver.

 

 Ward comes home from a long day at work and June is there dressed to the nines in her pearls to greet him with a kiss, hand him a drink and keep the kids at bay while Ward unwinds.  She is the home-maker who takes care of all womanly tasks... the house, the kids, the laundry, PTA,  (a willing sex life any time, anywhere... ssshhh, this is the 60s!) etc.  Ward's job is to bring home the bacon, do the finances, take out the trash and keep the car and yard in good order.

 

The good doctor was fun and funny... imagine that!

They provided us with two couples who foster that traditional relationship with their personal testimonials.  They seemed like very happy people.

 

I was struck by a couple of thoughts.  First, that is the household that I grew up in with a tiny twist.  My mom also worked with my dad part time.  Otherwise, that was pretty much how our family functioned... until my mom went through menopause and went a bit, well, crazy.  Then she became something of a women's libber.

 

Which leads to my second thought on this issue.  My now dead as a door nail ex-marriage was influenced by my mother's temporary menopausal insanity.  I was a well formed free spirit and demanding individual.  I went into marriage with a total split it all down the middle attitude.  You pull  your weight dude!  

 

Must have been a shock for a guy reared by a lunatic woman who not only doted on her husband but also on her children.  She used to make him a Sunday diner style lunch and deliver it hot to him at work when we were newly married because my bologna or peanut butter and jam sandwiches were not good enough.  Sheesh!   She was something else.

 

My third thought was to have a good hard laugh at myself.  As I listened to these couples talking about their traditional relationship style choice, there it was, the truth about my current relationship, ringing like a bell.  I have turned into June Cleaver!  Except that sex is often talked about and it honestly is any time any where.  Oooh baby!

 

So here is the question... are you traditional or modern and why?  What modifications have you made or mixes of the two?  We all function differently and even evolve over the years, or in my case, devolve. 

 

On the issue of love, Randy does not like the words "I love you" that much.  He says "Actions are better.  Show me.  I'll show you."

I think that is what the traditional relationship style is all about... when you show someone how much you care, they feel good about themselves and you.  I did not get that a bazillion years ago when I married.  Not that I was a harpie or anything like that.  I was a good wife, but I didn't always take the time to show it on a daily basis.   For me, that's a lesson learned.  It may well be different for you in a way that works as good.

 

As for myself.  I like being June Cleaver.  I never saw that coming.

CURIOUS VISITOR

Yesterday an osprey flew over our yard.  Not the best photo, but that fella could really move.  I got about five pictures of blank sky before I managed to get this one.  Ha!

I'm not sure what he/she was doing here... they generally cruise the rivers for fish.

But I can tell you this, all the frigging crows left

lickety-split!

I like that.

We tested out the Jenn Aire in the cabinet.

Perfect fit!

Some sanding.

A bit of putty... final sanding, staining and a coat of finish is scheduled for today.

:-)

T brought the counter top I wanted last night.

We hauled it out to the patio to see how it would look.

I am very happy and excited.  We wanted solid oak, and it is but we are staining it a nice medium walnut.

The counter top is sort of a dark slate.

Ooh!  Ooh!

T just called to say that he's going to bring the rest of what we need to do the counter top and help with it today!  Have you ever seen a grown woman wiggle like a puppy?

Oh yeah... I'm wiggling!

On another front... I have finally won the war with the weeds.  All that remains are daily patrols to keep them out.  

My day lilies and gailardia are in bloom.

The vinca is crazy healthy.

The homestead is looking good.

All that remains is this patch of weeds that belong to the city along the street.  

They own them, but take no responsibility for them.

Guess I'll go fire up the weed eater.

If I don't, you can bet they will migrate into my nice clean yard.

No way Jose!

"My Choice" today was to work on the yard and outdoor kitchen.

Not exactly a relaxing day, 

but I like to get things done.

And compared to my "to do list" for this coming week,

it's a walk in the park.

I'm trying to get my new name, address, etc. all up to date with everyone... Motor Vee, S. S., I.R.S. and Postal.   You would not believe all the hoops I have to jump through!

"Postal" is about what it driving me to...

but that's another post.

I hope your weekend was grand!

What did you do?

TRUTH BE TOLD...

This is Millie.  She brought her human for a BBQ.

She is not in pain... that is the intense mien of a basset chewing a bone.

Ok.  Down to the matter of truth or lies.

As Suldog pointed out on his truth or lies post, the best lies have some truth to them.  All of the ten statements I made had some measure of truth.

1) True.  I did have Randy pee in my composter...

the manufacturer suggested human urine to get the pot perking and help the PH balance!

Being a fan of the absurd, I had to ask him.

2)True.  Yes, I found an ice cream bar much more thrilling than the Grand Canyon.

3)True.  When I was little JFK was in town and had a diner at an upscale restaurant.  We did not attend the diner.  My parents believed that you had to teach children proper public behavior and introduce them to a variety of foods so that we would grow up to feel confident in social situations.  JFK walked through the restaurant on his way out and stopped to shake hands at the tables he passed.

Years later, Bobby Kennedy came to town and gave a speech at the college by my home.   I skipped school to go and watch his convertable... yes, even after the death of his brother; a convertable... slowly drive past the crowds.  As he did, he leaned out to shake hands.

4) True.  I have a thing about germs.  I did not have a dishwasher at the time and it felt like it was required to boil the silverware.  No, not the dishes or pans.

5) False!  While I do love Sean Connery, I did see one James Bond movie; "Goldfinger" and decided Bond was not my cup of tea.  I am sure that I have seen all his other movies.

6)True.  I did paint Christopher, our beloved basset pink twice.  We were painting our house... there was a bucket of pink paint, a dog and a brush.

Again, it felt required.

My parents did not like to spank, but they  considered it a cruelty to animals issue.

7) False!   I did love to taste dirt and sand... they all have unique flavors.  However, my brother never blindfolded me to show off my talent.

Incidentally, I was cured of my hobby when I found cat poop in my sand pile... after I took in a big mouthful.  ICK!

8)  False.  I cannot juggle to save my soul!

9)False.  What?  I know, it sounds so much like me!

I do love Irish coffee and a scoop of ice cream has been used in lieu of cream but not before devotions...

I save that for the blood of Christ. 

10) True.  I have never broken a bone in my body.

Like the Bumbles... I bounce!
If you missed the story of the severed toe...

FOUR DAYS MORE... AND I SAW A PALE RIDER

 

There you have it.  Life is good.  I spoke about my little habits or rituals a few posts back.  One that has evolved with my relationship is that I get up while Randy gets ready for work and do some nice things to send him on his way.  Small stuff... I make him an apple english muffin with honey and cinnamon on it, folded like a sandwich and then fill his cookie baggie.

 

This morning I slept through my niceties and was awakened by the good bye kiss.  This was the second time this week that I did not pop awake on my own and messed it up.  I felt bad the first time.  The whole day was a bit off because of it.

 

Crap!  Something had to be done to correct it... quick!

I could hear the truck starting up, so I did the only thing that came to mind and finished my nice ritual... which includes standing in the door way and waving good-bye until he drives off, waving back.

This time, instead of a steady backing out that glides into the move forward... he slammed on his breaks and put on his glasses.  He gave me a long stare, a big grin and waved good-bye.

Yep.  I stood there in the doorway naked as a jay.

I don't doubt that he will be thinking about me all day long.  Hee hee.  

Problem solved.  Its going to be a great day.

What nice thing have you done for someone lately?

ENLIGHTENMENT

I took this photo at a filbert farm (that would be hazel nuts to some of you) we hiked around a couple of weeks back.  Doesn't it look like there is some enlightenment waiting at the end down there?

I don’t do memes very often.  Mostly because some bloggers don’t enjoy doing them.  But this one was fun… and you don’t have to take it up if you don’t want to… but if  you want to, have at it!

The object is for me to tell you ten statements that may or may not be lies or truth.  You get to decide which is a lie or not.  You may respond to this anyway you wish… as individual shots or all inclusive.  One or none.

1)      I had Randy pee in my composter.

2)      When I was in third grade I went to see the Grand Canyon… my biggest thrill there was getting a Schwan’s ice cream bar from the snack shack.

3)      As a young child, I shook JFK’s hand.  As a young teenager, I shook his brother Robert’s hand.  Both died shortly after shaking my hand… and for a long time I wondered if they would have lived if I had not shaken their hands.

4)      I used to boil my silverware to be sure it was clean.

5)      Sean Connery is one of my favorite actors… but I have NEVER seen a James Bond movie.

6)      I was spanked only twice by my parents… both times it was for painting our basset hound pink.

7)      I was a dirt connoisseur… and could tell which part of our yard I was in by tasting the dirt.  My brother enjoyed showing this talent off to his friends by leading me around in a blindfold and testing me.

8)      I can juggle four objects at a time.

9)      I like to start my Sunday morning with a coffee laced with whiskey and topped with a scoop of vanilla ice cream… then do devotions in a more relaxed state.

10)  I have NEVER broken a bone in my body.  ( A severed toe does not count… that bone was cut, not broken.)

Okay... what do you think?