Thursday, August 27, 2009

dad stuff

When I first saw my dad yesterday I was struck by how frail he looked. Then I thought about it and realized that he has looked that way for awhile. I think the thing I liked most about seeing him aside from the obvious that I could see he was not in immediate peril… was that he retained his sense of humor. We laughed at how his hair was sticking straight up on top… you know that horrible chicken head look that people do to their babies… yeah like that.

Here’s the deal. He was given a medication that his body had a horrible reaction to… shutting down his kidneys and messing with his pancreas, so that food was not ingestible and he did not feel able to drink. He became dehydrated and confused, then frightened. I think it’s the latter that is the scariest to me. Nothing frightens my father. That felt so wrong.

The Medusa was there with her consort. He is a bit bizarre. Both are. Today she talked openly about her bipolar issues. Like we were there for that? Hello… not about you!

Poor Cinderella called. This is my sister that is wonderful, beautiful and smart. The day she left home was the day I began to mentally pack my own bags. My sense of home is anchored to Cinderella. We share a common phobia; The telephone. I did not have a phone for many years because I could not bear to answer it and hear bad news or worse, the Medusa on the other end.

Cinderella has the same phobia. Her husband screens all calls to her. So it was with a great sense of shame that I said hello to her and passed the phone to the Medusa… who kept her on line for at least 20 minutes of what I know was torture for her. But it bought me time to talk to my father by myself. I hope she forgives me, but know that she will.

My fondest memory of Cinderella was of us together in Great Grandma’s extraordinary garden. When we sat quietly on the bench, monarch butterflies would come and land on Cinderella, pumping their beautiful wings, but staying so I could watch them. We were dark and had deep dark eyes and brown skin. Cinderella burned in the sun, had lovely green eyes and blond hair. Obviously she was a fairy changeling. When she sang, she sounded like Julie Andrews. Disney could not have made me a better sister.

Whenever we get together, we laugh until we snort and cry. It’s such a tremendous release of tension and so fun. She will be here next month for dad’s birthday.

I told my dad that I was divorcing yesterday. That made him happy. For once he was not insulting about my life choices. That was a nice change, but not as much like him as I’d feel good about… a good rant would have said he was himself. We will see how it goes today.

I’m about to leave. I’ll go up the Washington side of the river today. I am in no rush and the drive is wonderful for the spirit. It is slower at 55 and full of great curves and various grades. If you like to feel your way when you drive… and I do get into it… it is a fun way to go. The old forest you drive thought is stunning too.

Tomorrow I’ll bring Miss Bliss back if things go okay. If she is missing, you’ll know that there has been a turn for the worse.

Thank you all so much for your prayers and good vibes and thoughts. You’re the best. I just got a text from my doc that said that all the tests yesterday came out negative. Good news. But they have more to do… so keep that good positive thing flowing! It is much appreciated.

I think I’ll listen to something pretty while I drive. This:

Bridge Over Troubled Water live in 1969.

Be glad you're not with me... I'll be singing along. ;)


  1. Well, drive safely. And hope things go ok. Great writing BTW.

  2. Pamela-- Thanks for the compliment. I always drive safely... okay, most of the time. This is a nice slow drive.

  3. Oh, I'm so glad to hear that your dad seems to be pretty stable. Also, that Medusa seems to be somewhat under control?
    Keeping the good thoughts heading in your direction.

  4. laura b.-- Yes, dad is getting better! Yay!

    And the Medusa is almost sane. I can't tell you what a relief that is or how scary at the same time... its hard not to wait for the other shoe to drop. But she is on medication and sticking to it. That is great news. Thanks for the good thoughts and for noticing!

  5. Umm....yeah....I'm glad I won't have to have that song stuck in my head :)))xox

  6. Braja-- Oh no... is it an ear worm for you? I love that one! Sorry about that. Good to see you! I've been preoccupied and not been visiting as much. I will though. Thanks for coming by.

  7. Braja-- Or maybe you meant me singing that song... now that is something you want to avoid at all costs! Ha

  8. ananda - i am glad you are having tender moments with your da -

  9. crazy4coens-- Not sure that you can call them tender. but I am trying. I do want him to get better.

  10. All-- It seems that he has a belly full of ulcers. Totally treatable. they will keep him until he is eating solid foods and regaining weight again. Thanks for all the concern folks!
    All your good thoughts, prayers, and vibes have been gratefully accepted. big grins...

  11. I hope it all goes well. Hang in there...

  12. It's good to read that your dad is good spirits. I hope the drive was as perfect as you describe. Should I think positive or negative? Think about it. I think I'll be optimistic.

  13. Glad to hear that your dad is improving :-)

  14. Churlita, AlienCG and Cube--
    Thanks for the good thoughts.

    There was a problem with his dog... all better now. Phew! Be just my luck to kill his dog while he was in the hospital. Had to take him to the vet. He ate something bad and was sick all over... so I've been carpet cleaning and having oh so much fun! YUCK! This is why I am a cat person.

    All my plans are on hold right now. Date has been postponed to next weekend... it's a nice long weekend anyway. :)

    See you guys at the Scavenger Hunt, I hope.

  15. Great news.

    A little Simon and Garfunkel livens any journey.

    Best wishes.

  16. Thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

  17. Michael-- Thank you.

    Sebastien-- Thank you too! You guys are great. Much appreciated.